AngerLearn more about anger issues and fighting bystander intervention:


Unhealthy anger is…

An overreaction to a justified wrong.

 

Scenario: Anger

You and a few teammates are at a party when someone begins insulting you (for being athletes, for a team’s performance, etc.).
 
Despite everyone’s best effort to ignore these obnoxious comments, you can see one of your teammates is becoming more and more irritated. He has a history of losing his temper. What do you do?

Additional Anger Scenarios

Click to view additional scenarios

Anger Scenario
You are at a party with some friends. A guy who is drunk comes over and makes a very racist comment to your friend who is African American. You find it very offensive as well but notice that your friend reacts immediately and starts to go for the guy. What do you do?

 

Questions

  1. Can anger be a good thing (functional anger)? If so, when?
  2. Have you been at a party where a fight broke out? What happened? What did you do? Were you a bystander or intervener — why? Would you do anything differently now?
  3. Do you think there are people who look for fights? Why?
  4. Do you think people sometimes target student-athletes? Why?
  5. Is anger an athletic community issue? How so?
  6. What are some possible triggers?
  7. Are there unwritten codes of conduct acceptable in certain subcultures that may not be permissible in the general population? Explain/Describe.
  8. If you use anger to “pump yourself up” as a student-athlete, is it hard to turn it off when you are away from your sport? Why or why not?

Considerations

In the athletic world, it is sometimes more acceptable to express anger and not other emotions. Therefore, many people will act angry when they are really feeling something else that they are uncomfortable expressing, such as:

  • Stress
  • Frustration
  • Fear
  • Annoyance
  • Disappointment
  • Resentment
  • Shame
  • Embarrassment
  • Hurt

Anger is a normal emotion that becomes a problem when it:

  • Is too intense
  • Lasts too long
  • Occurs too frequently
  • Escalates
    • Overreacting to a justified wrong
    • Carries over on field/off field (environment/situations)
  • Focuses and blames only “others” – world, situation, anything except self
  • Is harmful to self or others
  • Leads to aggression or violence
  • Destroys personal relationships

Some common causes of anger are:

  • Being too ego-driven or invested — Taking it TOO personally
  • Getting sucked in — No longer looking for ways out (exits) or solutions

People who fight often:

  • Misinterpret the intent or motives of others
  • Are unable to see alternative rationales
  • Are openly and frequently defiant of requests
  • Vocalize anger: furious temper, uncontrollable fits of rage
  • Demean or swear directly to parent or others in authority positions
  • Make threats; are aggressive
  • Seem to have “emotional diarrhea,” and “lets it all out, all the time”
  • Have difficulty accepting “No” for an answer
  • Do not follow rules; often feels rules are “stupid,” or don’t apply
  • Destroy property
  • Are physically cruel to animals
  • Are physically cruel to people
  • Initiate fights with others
  • Seriously violate rules (at home, in school, or society in general)

Action Steps

  1. Create plans together to avoid high-risk situations and consequences
  2. Be aware of triggers
  3. Be aware of defined danger:
    • mad dogging
    • dirty looks
    • Is another individual looking for a fight?
  4. Do not try to detain angry individuals — even if they run away
  5. Interrupt the situation/Distract the people involved
  6. Beware of increasing aggressive behavior and try to diffuse the situation

What bystanders should remind the individuals involved:

  • STOP AND THINK – Is it worth it in the long run?
  • REMOVE THE DRAMA
  • REMOVE THE EGO
  • Avoid Retaliation/Escalation
  • Agree with rationale but challenge the action
  • Focus on solving the problem NOT winning the “fight”
  • Don’t get caught up in the moment and don’t let others bring them down. Think of the big picture
  • Try to see it from a different point of view – feeling anger and empathy at the same time are incompatible responses

What bystanders should do for themselves:

  • WALK AWAY if the situation is unsafe.
  • Stay calm, cool and collected.
  • Contact 9-1-1 if necessary

Resources

Anger Presentation

For an approximately hour long presentation on anger, using Step UP! training, Click Here.

These presentations do not intend to cover all aspects of the topic nor to be the authority on the subject matter. They are merely starting points. You are encouraged to use your own resources and professionals on campus to help supplement the information and co-present if possible.

Handouts

Local

  • 9-1-1
  • Campus Counseling Center
  • Anger Management classes
  • Hall Director if in the dorms

National


For further information, please contact us.

Photo of angry student courtesy Gratisography.